It was the early part of March... and the weather was nice and mild... there in picturesque Wilgespruit... situated half way... between Pretoria and Johannesburg...
And as Esme and Grazia... started to walk towards Esme's car... to drive back to Pretoria... one of the Committee Members... a very handsome... very tall... dignified Colored man from Cape Town... a total stranger... whom she will never... ever forget... walked up to them... and told them... in very terse... clipped modulated English... his face very stern... that he would be back for them... in thirty minutes...!
And when Grazia... looked up at him... very puzzled... she was flabbergasted... to hear him go on to say... to escort them... to see BAPAK...!
Grazia was struck dumb... at this most unexpected news...
Then mortified... the thought flashed through her mind...
"Oh my God... BAPAK is going to give me a dressing down... because of my exposed legs...!"
And feeling sick to her stomach... she wanted the ground... to swallow her up...
Then she felt a Thrill... Flash through her...
Wait a minute... here she was about to have an audience... with the most Spiritually Holy Man... in the whole wide world...!
And here was a Golden Opportunity... for her to ask him questions... questions about Spiritual Truths... that had plagued her... all her life...
...such as about Reincarnation... and instances of "Deja Vu"... (Already Seen)...
...because even at two years old... when she and Mummie and Papa... having moved from Italy... where she was born... to Peking China... for a year... then on to Kobe Japan... everything about the country... was so very familiar to her...!
She knew all about the Bushido codes of honor... and traditions... and would also know the family names... of the proprietors of the inns... she and Papa and her stepmother Xenia... visited... on their weekend hikes... through the beautiful countryside...!
And she could also ask BAPAK... why it was... that while living in Peking... she already spoke fluent Hiragana... the Japanese language... of the upper classes... without ever anybody teaching her...!
And all about Karma... remembering her past life... as a Nipponese court lady... and being the daughter... of a prominent... ruling Shogun...!
And then there was the Divine Law of Cause and Effect... and all the other mysterious Spiritual subjects... that had fascinated her... all her life...!
She was now feeling... a mixture of looking forward to her meeting... with the Great Holy Man of God... BAPAK.. and the dread... of convincing him... that she was not just a shallow bubble-head... an empty shell... but an extremely serious SUBUD soul...
100% committed... in her total submission... to her Heavenly Father... Almighty God... and unconditional... in her surrender... to the Power... of His Holy Life Force... Felt strongly in her Latihans...
But she was still in a dithery quandary... when the man finally came back to fetch them... seeming like centuries... had passed... in the interim...
Her heart now pounding... in Grazia's chest... and becoming fearful... that one of those peculiar heart beat lurches... of still no medical name... might attack her... at any moment... which... ever since she was eight years old... would instantly drain her... of all strength... in sheer trepidation... of what was to come... when they reached the huge portals... instead of escorting them inside... the man left them there... to fend for themselves...
Looking at each other... wide-eyed... all of Grazia's hope... that at this crucial moment... her friend Esme... who was very psychic... born under the sign of Scorpio... just like Grazia's Beloved Richard... would have Received something important for them... was quashed... by the blank... dazed look... in Esme's huge brown eyes...
They both took a deep breath... and opened the now extremely heavy doors... and stepped through... ... into total darkness...!
Immediately overwhelmed... by the huge auditorium... now empty... and dark... Grazia... becoming aware... as never before... that she was now in the presence... of the Holiest man on earth... felt her heart pounding... weighed down with the heaviness... of her many sins...
And as she began to slowly walk up... towards the stage... far far away... feeling full of shame... vaguely conscious... that Esme had stepped backward... behind her... for the life of her... she could not lift her head up... keeping it downcast... until the toes of her shoes... encountered the edge of the stage...
Very fearful now... that if she looked up... BAPAK would look down at her face... and see how "dirty" she was... with sheer determination... telling herself... that she had to look up... otherwise she would be making a fool of herself... in front of him... somehow... she finally... managed... to lift her... by now... increasingly heavy head...
But... as soon as her eyes... wandered slowly up BAPAK's seated body... to his face... in the semi-darkness... and very reluctantly... further up to his all-knowing eyes... she was suddenly amazed... To Feel... As If She Was Completely Free Of Sin... And Weighed... No More... Than A Light Feather...!
And Feeling Light-hearted... And Happy... she heard BAPAK say something to Usman... sitting next to him... and Usman's soft... cultured voice... ask her how long... she had been in SUBUD...
Suddenly overcome with shyness... her eyes downcast once again... she was barely able to answer... giving BAPAK the impression... somehow... that she had been "Opened"... only for a short time... barely two years... instead of six...!
And when... after a brief exchange with Usman... he translated... asking her how long she had been a Helper... and still barely able to talk above a whisper... heard BAPAK say...:
"Very good... Helper four years...!"
Realizing that she had been misunderstood... blushing profusely... she cleared her throat... and corrected the error... telling them... that she had been in SUBUD for six years... and a Helper... for only three...
To which BAPAK smiled warmly... saying directly to her... again in English...:
"BAPAK understands... you make good progress... BAPAK recommends... you Helper four years... then stop... wait four years... then Helper again four years...!"
(As her SUBUD Life turned out... it was just as BAPAK had ordained... four years on... four years off... as a Helper... in the different Groups and Centers... she belonged in... just about to come to an end... in Pretoria South Africa... because she was about to meet her third husband... French/Canadian... Jacques Parent...!
And later on... after her necessary pan-hysterectomy... and three years of living with him... on the Caribbean island of Antigua... isolated from SUBUD Groups... she became active... once again... for four years... in different parts of the USA...
...such as Miami Florida... San Francisco... and Marin... in California... and lastly Seattle... in Washington... without any planning...
Even in her four years... of Allah Commanded isolation from them... right after He Commanded her... to reluctantly marry... twelve years younger Farlan... and began her serious Training of...:
"Now Inner Life Only... No More Outer Life..."!)
Then followed a longish silence... with BAPAK looking down at six foot tall Grazia... with a fond look... in his eyes...
Then BAPAK closed his eyes... and after a few moments... lifting his noble head... he addressed Grazia in English... once again... saying...:
"BAPAK ask... you have questions...?!!!"
Her Spirit Soared... Here was her Golden Opportunity... to get some real Spiritual Goodies of Truth... from this Holy Man of God...
But Suddenly Finding Herself... In A Powerful State Of Spontaneous Latihan... Her Head Was Made To Raise Up... And Her Blue Eyes To Look Up... Directly... Into BAPAK'S Dark Eyes... And All Her Shyness... Had Evaporated...!
Then to her horror... and utter consternation... her mouth Opened... and out Came... the most unexpected Response... imaginable...
Like a blithering idiot... she said... her Voice Trilling Happily...:
"Questions...? What Questions...?!"
And then... she Burst Into Hysterical Laughter...!
And before she knew it... BAPAK burst into Laughter... as well... and they Laughed... and Laughed... together... and every time their eyes met... off she would go again... into Peals of Laughter... still in Latihan... Laughing her Ecstatically Happy head off... BAPAK Laughing heartily along with her...!
Then all of a sudden... she felt BAPAK Flash a Message... inside her... and stunned... looking up at him... with a querulous...:
"Aaaaah...?"
Bapak nodded his head... at her... beaming...: "Ja... ja...!"...
And in that instant... Grazia understood... why... ever since she knew... that BAPAK was finally coming to South Africa... she had not had... a real feeling of reverence... towards him... as she should have... but feeling... somehow... as if she was going to see her beloved "family"... which had made her feel slightly ashamed...
For what BAPAK... Flashed at her thirty-six year old self... was...:
"You Are My Mother...!!!???"
Finally calming down... as Grazia stood there... dumb-founded... at his extraordinary Revelation... BAPAK turned his attention to Esme... who was standing quietly... through the whole... idiotic exchange of Laughter... and asked her how long... she had been "Opened"... and to her reply of... two years... also barely able to talk... above a whisper... nodded his head... encouragingly... and said to her in English...:
"Very good progress... for only two years..."
Grazia Was Not Allowed to speak... of BAPAK's incredible Revelation to her... for six years... for whenever she tried to... her throat would Close Up... Stopping her...!
And when she was finally Allowed to do so... it was hardly a casual passing on... of a Spiritual Goodie... but in the telling of it... both she... and the listener... would be Flooded... with an enormous feeling of Respect... and Reverence... Tears flooding their eyes...
As a matter of fact... the first SUBUD Sister... she shared it with... having become Laura... was to her namesake... Laura Kennedy... whose husband Machmud... considered her... as his material wife... and this Laura... as his Spiritual wife...!!!
Many... many years later... when Muftiah was in her seventies... and her Beloved BAPAK... began to appear to her... in Heavenly Visitations... while she was in the middle of her writing... to dictate important Messages for mankind to her... did she come to realize... what BAPAK had meant... so many years earlier...
And it was simply... that both BAPAK and she... were utterly devoted to their Creator... ALLAH ALMIGHTY GOD... to the same degree... and would do anything... for Him... be His soldier... His slave...
And even descend... into the very depths of Hell... at His Command... which she had done... not just once... but twice...!
First to rescue... her second husband... French/Dutch hotelier Rene... a die hard... hopeless alcoholic... and blatantly unfaithful... bi-sexual... who died of hepatitis... a year after her HEAVENLY FATHER... Commanded her... to divorce him... after three years of Hell... being married to him... because he refused... to give up his whiskey... but gave up SUBUD instead...!
Then to rescue her six years older... beloved sister... Prima/Rafaela... also an alcoholic nymphomaniac... whose one spurned lover... of hundreds... had shot her to death...!
(THE WONDERFUL VISIT OF BELOVED BAPAK... TO SOUTH AFRICA... AFTER SIX LONG YEARS... OF WAITING FOR HIM... To be Continued with Part VI ... BAPAK'S TALK TO SUBUD
JOHANNESBURG - March 14th 1967... Insha Allah... God Willing... Monday 2/7/11...)
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